{"id":1474,"date":"2014-12-31T12:50:54","date_gmt":"2014-12-31T10:50:54","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1474"},"modified":"2014-12-31T12:50:54","modified_gmt":"2014-12-31T10:50:54","slug":"computer-vocabuluary","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1474","title":{"rendered":"Computer Vocabuluary"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Analog<br \/>\nHors d&#8217;oeurve, usually made from cheese and covered with crushed nuts<\/li>\n<p><li>Backup<br \/>\nOpposite of go forward<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Batch Processing<br \/>\nMaking a lot of cookies at once<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Binary<br \/>\nPossessing the ability to have friends of both sexes<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Bit<br \/>\n12 1\/2 cents<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Branch<br \/>\nIf watered, it will grow into a computer club (see computer club)<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Buffer<br \/>\nProgrammer who works in the nude<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Bug<br \/>\nProgrammer&#8217;s term for a feature<\/p>\n<p>An elusive creature living in a program which makes it incorrect.<\/p>\n<p>Note: the activity of &#8220;debugging&#8221; or removing bugs from a program ends when a programmer gets tired of doing it, not when all the bugs are removed<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Character Density<br \/>\nThe number of very weird people in the office, divided by the floor space<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Computer<br \/>\nA device designed to speed and automate errors<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Computer Club<br \/>\nUsed to strike computer forcefully upon receiving error messages<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Coding<br \/>\nAn addictive drug<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Compile<br \/>\nA heap of decomposing vegetable matter<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Compiler<br \/>\nNoah Webster (1758-1843)<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Console<br \/>\nWhat one does to a depressed computer<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Cursor<br \/>\nAn expert in 4-letter words<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Dump<br \/>\nA system programmer&#8217;s work area<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Feature<br \/>\nHardware limitation as described by a marketing representative<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Hardware<br \/>\nThe parts of a computer which can be kicked<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Keyboard<br \/>\nAn instrument used for entering errors into a system<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Language<br \/>\nA system of organizing and defining error messages<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Loop<br \/>\nSee loop<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Machine-independent Program<br \/>\nA program which will not run on any machine<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Microcomputer<br \/>\nOne millionth of a computer<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Null String<br \/>\nThe result of a 4-hour database search<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>On-line<br \/>\nThe idea that a human should always be accessible<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Password<br \/>\nThe nonsense word taped to your terminal<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Performance<br \/>\nA statement of the speed at which a computer system works. Or rather, might work under certain circumstances. Or was rumored to be working about a month ago<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Printer<br \/>\nJohann Gutenberg (1400-1468)<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Quality Control<br \/>\nEnsuring that the quality of a product does not get out of hand and add to the cost of its manufacture or design<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Strategy<br \/>\nA long-range plan whose merit cannot be evaluated until sometime after those creating it have left the organization<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>User<br \/>\nSomeone requiring drug rehabilitation<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>8-bit machine<br \/>\nA computer selling for $1.00 (see bit)<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>16-bit machine<br \/>\nA computer selling for $2.00 (see bit)<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Analog Hors d&#8217;oeurve, usually made from cheese and covered with crushed nuts Backup Opposite of go forward Batch Processing Making a lot of cookies at once Binary Possessing the ability to have friends of both sexes Bit 12 1\/2 cents Branch If watered, it will grow into a computer club (see computer club) Buffer Programmer [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[406,492],"class_list":["post-1474","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dictionaries","tag-computer","tag-definitions"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1474","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1474"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1474\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1474"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1474"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1474"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}