{"id":1445,"date":"2014-12-30T23:58:01","date_gmt":"2014-12-30T21:58:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1445"},"modified":"2014-12-30T23:58:01","modified_gmt":"2014-12-30T21:58:01","slug":"advertising-lingo","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1445","title":{"rendered":"Advertising Lingo"},"content":{"rendered":"<p align=\"center\">What those advertising terms really mean:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>New<br \/>\nDifferent color from previous design.<\/li>\n<p><li>All New<br \/>\nParts are not interchangeable with previous design.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Exclusive<br \/>\nImported product.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Unmatched<br \/>\nAlmost as good as the competition.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Foolproof Operation<br \/>\nNo provision for adjustments.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Advanced Design<br \/>\nThe advertising agency doesn&#8217;t understand it.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>It&#8217;s Here at Last<br \/>\nRush job. Nobody knew it was coming.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Field Tested<br \/>\nManufacturer lacks test equipment.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>High Accuracy<br \/>\nUnit on which all parts fit.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<li>Futuristic<\/td>\n<td>No other reason why it looks the way it does.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Redesigned<br \/>\nPrevious flaws fixed &#8211; we hope.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Direct Sales Only<br \/>\nFactory had a big argument with distributor.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Years of Development<br \/>\nWe finally got one to work.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Breakthrough<br \/>\nWe finally figured out a use for it.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Maintenance Free<br \/>\nImpossible to fix.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Meets All Standards<br \/>\nOurs, not yours.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Solid-State<br \/>\nHeavy as heck.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>High Reliability<br \/>\nWe made it work long enough to ship it.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>What those advertising terms really mean: New Different color from previous design. All New Parts are not interchangeable with previous design. Exclusive Imported product. Unmatched Almost as good as the competition. Foolproof Operation No provision for adjustments. Advanced Design The advertising agency doesn&#8217;t understand it. It&#8217;s Here at Last Rush job. Nobody knew it was [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[16],"tags":[107,492],"class_list":["post-1445","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-dictionaries","tag-advertising","tag-definitions"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1445","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1445"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1445\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1445"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1445"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1445"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}