{"id":1439,"date":"2014-12-30T01:11:09","date_gmt":"2014-12-29T23:11:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1439"},"modified":"2014-12-30T01:11:09","modified_gmt":"2014-12-29T23:11:09","slug":"yuppie-women","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1439","title":{"rendered":"Yuppie Women"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Father to Yuppette&#8217;s boyfriend, who arrived to take her on a date: &#8220;She&#8217;ll be right down. Care for a game of chess ?&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>One Yuppette to another: &#8220;He likes my company, and I just love his.  I think it&#8217;s called the First Fidelity Trust.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>Two Yuppettes were discussing their current relationships: &#8220;At first he seemed dull and uninteresting, but when you finally get to know him, he&#8217;s downright boring.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>The Yuppette was considering the proposal of marriage she had just received: &#8220;Let me hear that part again where you realize you&#8217;re not half good enough for me.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>The Yuppette was standing on the porch, with her Mother, watching her boyfriend depart: &#8220;But Mother, I&#8217;m positive he&#8217;s been faithful to me. The seat belts never need readjusting.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>I have a new definition for y&#8217;all to consider. A Lesbian Yuppette is nothing more than a mannish depressive with delusions of gender.<\/li>\n<li>So many Yuppettes seem to appreciate the quiet things in life &#8212;  Like the folding of a five hundred dollar bill.<\/li>\n<li>The Yuppette was obviously tiring of her current beau when she asked: &#8220;When people ask me what I see in you Raymond, what shall I tell them?&#8221;<\/P>\n<li>The bored Yuppette said to her date: &#8220;I think I&#8217;ll have another drink.  It makes you so witty and charming.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>The Yuppette was trying to reassure her lover during sex: &#8220;Of course you&#8217;re not the first man I&#8217;ve made love to. You know I think more of you than to just use you as a guinea pig.&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s easy to spot the nouveau riche Yuppettes in Columbia, Maryland.  They&#8217;re the ones watering their flower beds with bottled water.<\/li>\n<li>You&#8217;ll very seldom see a Yuppette eating a hot dog. None are certified or warranted by the Kennel Club.<\/li>\n<li>Most Yuppette&#8217;s have no use for men who try to mess up the country&#8217;s economy by living within their income.<\/li>\n<li>I&#8217;ve noticed the oddest behavior in most Yuppettes. The only time they won&#8217;t look in a mirror is when they&#8217;re pulling out of a parking space.<\/li>\n<li>This phrase that most Yuppettes use &#8212; &#8220;professional woman.&#8221;  I mean, come on. When&#8217;s the last time you met an &#8220;amateur&#8221; one?<\/li>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Father to Yuppette&#8217;s boyfriend, who arrived to take her on a date: &#8220;She&#8217;ll be right down. Care for a game of chess ?&#8221; One Yuppette to another: &#8220;He likes my company, and I just love his. I think it&#8217;s called the First Fidelity Trust.&#8221; Two Yuppettes were discussing their current relationships: &#8220;At first he seemed [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[924,1556],"class_list":["post-1439","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-for-women","tag-lists","tag-yuppette"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1439","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1439"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1439\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1439"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1439"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1439"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}