{"id":1433,"date":"2014-12-30T00:55:34","date_gmt":"2014-12-29T22:55:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1433"},"modified":"2014-12-30T00:55:34","modified_gmt":"2014-12-29T22:55:34","slug":"what-men-are-like","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1433","title":{"rendered":"What Men Are Like"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><UL><br \/>\n<LI>Men are like&#8230;..Coffee.<br \/>\nThe best ones are rich, warm, full-bodied, and can keep you up all night long.<\/LI><\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Chocolate Bars.<br \/>\nSweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Blenders.<br \/>\nYou need one, but you&#8217;re not quite sure why.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Coolers.<br \/>\nLoad them with beer and you can take them anywhere.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Copiers.<br \/>\nYou need them for reproduction, but that&#8217;s about it.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Curling irons.<br \/>\nThey&#8217;re always hot, and they&#8217;re always in your hair.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Government bonds.<br \/>\nThey take so long to mature.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..High heels.<br \/>\nThey&#8217;re easy to walk on once you get the hang of it.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Horoscopes.<br \/>\nThey always tell you what to do and are usually wrong.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Lava lamps.<br \/>\nFun to look at, but not all that bright.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Laxatives.<br \/>\nThey irritate the shit out of you.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Mascara.<br \/>\nThey usually run at the first sign of emotion.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Mini skirts.<br \/>\nIf you&#8217;re not careful, they&#8217;ll creep up on your butt.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Noodles.<br \/>\nThey&#8217;re always in hot water, they lack taste, and they need dough.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Parking spots.<br \/>\nThe good ones are already taken and the ones that are left are handicapped or extremely small.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Plungers.<br \/>\nThey spend most of their lives in a hardware store or the bathroom.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Popcorn.<br \/>\nThey satisfy you, but only for a little while.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Placemats.<br \/>\nThey only show up when there&#8217;s food on the table.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Snowstorms.<br \/>\nYou never know when he&#8217;s coming, how many inches you&#8217;ll get or how long he will last.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Used Cars.<br \/>\nBoth are easy-to-get, cheap, and unreliable.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Vacations.<br \/>\nThey never seem to be long enough.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<p><li>Men are like&#8230;..Weather<br \/>\nNothing can be done to change either one of them.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Men are like&#8230;..Coffee. The best ones are rich, warm, full-bodied, and can keep you up all night long. Men are like&#8230;..Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips. Men are like&#8230;..Blenders. You need one, but you&#8217;re not quite sure why. Men are like&#8230;..Coolers. Load them with beer and you can take [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[26],"tags":[924,991],"class_list":["post-1433","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-for-women","tag-lists","tag-men"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1433","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1433"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1433\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1433"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1433"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1433"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}