{"id":1347,"date":"2014-12-28T17:45:18","date_gmt":"2014-12-28T15:45:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1347"},"modified":"2014-12-28T17:45:18","modified_gmt":"2014-12-28T15:45:18","slug":"signs-your-mate-is-cheating-on-you","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1347","title":{"rendered":"Signs Your Mate is Cheating on You"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Carpools with Devine Brown.<\/li>\n<li>Motel 6 names him &#8220;Customer of the Year.&#8221; <\/li>\n<li>Mysterious phone calls in the middle of the night from some guy named &#8220;President Bill.&#8221; <\/li>\n<li>You intercept a love note signed by all of the Oakland Raiders.<\/li>\n<li>That naked guy standing in the corner pretending to be a hat rack isn&#8217;t fooling anyone.<\/li>\n<li>Starts buying those lame excuses you give when you get home late from your mistress&#8217;s house.<\/li>\n<li>Glenn Close speeds by your house every twenty minutes.<\/li>\n<li>Models new lingerie saying, &#8220;If you were my lover, would this turn you on?&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>The smell of Brut is all over her, and you&#8217;re strictly an Old Spice man.<\/li>\n<li>Asks you how you would feel about appearing on &#8220;Jenny Jones&#8221;.<\/li>\n<li>Every night: comes home late, carves another notch in the bedpost and giggles himself to sleep.<\/li>\n<li>The cat has that &#8220;I know something that you don&#8217;t know&#8221; look.<\/li>\n<li>Bill Cosby called her as a character witness.<\/li>\n<li>Closet full of Gideon Bibles.<\/li>\n<li>Raoul the pool-boy is always hanging around, and you have NO pool!<\/li>\n<li>Amy Fisher shoots you in the head.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Carpools with Devine Brown. Motel 6 names him &#8220;Customer of the Year.&#8221; Mysterious phone calls in the middle of the night from some guy named &#8220;President Bill.&#8221; You intercept a love note signed by all of the Oakland Raiders. That naked guy standing in the corner pretending to be a hat rack isn&#8217;t fooling anyone. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[36],"tags":[352,965],"class_list":["post-1347","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-men-vs-womendating","tag-cheated","tag-marriage"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1347","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1347"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1347\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1347"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1347"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1347"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}