{"id":1260,"date":"2014-12-21T11:01:34","date_gmt":"2014-12-21T11:01:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=30"},"modified":"2014-12-21T11:01:34","modified_gmt":"2014-12-21T11:01:34","slug":"how-to-stay-young-by-george-carlin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1260","title":{"rendered":"How to Stay Young by George Carlin"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height.  Let the doctor worry about them. That is why you pay him\/her. <\/li>\n<li>Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. <\/li>\n<li>Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts,  gardening, whatever..     Never let the brain idle. &#8220;An idle mind is the devil&#8217;s workshop.&#8221;  And the devil&#8217;s name is Alzheimer&#8217;s. <\/li>\n<li>Enjoy the simple things.<\/li>\n<li>Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.<\/li>\n<li>The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves.  Be ALIVE while you are alive. <\/li>\n<li>Surround yourself with what you love, whether it&#8217;s family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.<\/li>\n<li>Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it.  If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.<\/li>\n<li>Don&#8217;t take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, to the next county, to a foreign country, but NOT to where the guilt is. <\/li>\n<li>Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h3>AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:<\/h3>\n<p><P>Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.<\/P><\/p>\n<p>If you don&#8217;t send this to at least 8 people&#8230;. who cares?<\/p>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctor worry about them. That is why you pay him\/her. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever.. Never let the brain idle. &#8220;An idle mind is the devil&#8217;s workshop.&#8221; And the [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[2],"tags":[115,709,924,1094],"class_list":["post-1260","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-aging","tag-aging","tag-george-carlin","tag-lists","tag-old"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1260","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1260"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1260\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1260"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1260"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1260"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}