{"id":122,"date":"2014-12-21T13:25:23","date_gmt":"2014-12-21T13:25:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=122"},"modified":"2014-12-21T13:25:23","modified_gmt":"2014-12-21T13:25:23","slug":"all-i-need-to-know-about-life-i-learned-from-my-therapist","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=122","title":{"rendered":"All I Need to Know About Life I Learned From My Therapist"},"content":{"rendered":"<ul>\n<li>You should feel guilty.<\/li>\n<li>Of course you have to pay for missed appointments.<\/li>\n<li>Quit complaining and get a cat.<\/li>\n<li>If sex isn&#8217;t dirty, you&#8217;re doing it wrong.<\/li>\n<li>You&#8217;re not really ugly. You&#8217;re just funny looking.<\/li>\n<li>Reality. Try it!<\/li>\n<li>Quit blaming your mother. It&#8217;s your father&#8217;s fault.<\/li>\n<li>Learn to dread one day at a time.<\/li>\n<li>If you&#8217;re really happy, you must be in denial.<\/li>\n<li>You&#8217;re still having a lousy childhood. Get help!<\/li>\n<li>Being happy isn&#8217;t for everyone.<\/li>\n<li>If you hear voices telling you to go to Hawaii, obey. Just don&#8217;t think about it.<\/li>\n<li>This is as good as it gets.<\/li>\n<li>If your inner child robs a bank, it&#8217;s you who will go to jail.<\/li>\n<li>Before you start a 12-step program, be sure to see a podiatrist.<\/li>\n<li>Sex is no problem. No sex is a problem.<\/li>\n<li>Only hams get cured. Uh-huh.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>You should feel guilty. Of course you have to pay for missed appointments. Quit complaining and get a cat. If sex isn&#8217;t dirty, you&#8217;re doing it wrong. You&#8217;re not really ugly. You&#8217;re just funny looking. Reality. Try it! Quit blaming your mother. It&#8217;s your father&#8217;s fault. Learn to dread one day at a time. If [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[128,924,1432],"class_list":["post-122","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-all-i-need","tag-all-i-need","tag-lists","tag-therapist"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/122","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=122"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/122\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=122"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=122"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=122"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}