{"id":1209,"date":"2014-12-27T12:41:07","date_gmt":"2014-12-27T10:41:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1209"},"modified":"2014-12-27T12:41:07","modified_gmt":"2014-12-27T10:41:07","slug":"the-dr-seuss-purity-test","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1209","title":{"rendered":"The Dr. Seuss Purity Test"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Have you done it on a boat?<br \/>\nHave you done it with a goat?<br \/>\nHave you done it in a bed?<br \/>\nHave you done it with the dead?<br \/>\nHave you done it in the ass?<br \/>\nHave you done it, high on grass?<br \/>\nHave you done it in the car?<br \/>\nHave you simply gone too far?<br \/>\nHave you done it on the beach?<br \/>\nHave you done it with the teach?<br \/>\nHave you done it on your back?<br \/>\nHave you done it strapped to a rack?<br \/>\nHave you done it in a box?<br \/>\nHave you done it with a fox?<br \/>\nHave you done it in a tree?<br \/>\nHave you done it with more than three?<br \/>\nHave you done it in the rain?<br \/>\nHave you done it for the pain?<br \/>\nHave you done it &#8216;tween the tits?<br \/>\nHave you done it wearing mitts?<br \/>\nHave you done it packed in rubber?<br \/>\nHave you done it undercover?<br \/>\nHave you done it on a perch?<br \/>\nHave you done it in a church?<br \/>\nHave you done it with a virgin?<br \/>\nHave you done it with a sturgeon?<br \/>\nHave you done it with ropes and chains?<br \/>\nHave you done it while insane?<br \/>\nHave you done it on the stage?<br \/>\nHave you done it underage?<br \/>\nHave you done it with all your friends?<br \/>\nHave you done it in both ends?<br \/>\nHave you done it with your dog?<br \/>\nHave you done it on a log?<br \/>\nHave you done it under clamps?<br \/>\nHave you done it with the lamps?<br \/>\nHave you done it without style?<br \/>\nHave you done it in a pile?<br \/>\nHave you done it for all to see?<br \/>\nHave you ever had VD?<br \/>\nHave you done it on Mother&#8217;s couch?<br \/>\nHave you done it in your mouth?<br \/>\nHave you done it while on tape?<br \/>\nHave you done it out of shape?<br \/>\nHave you done it on live TV?<br \/>\nHave you done it whilst you pee?<br \/>\nHave you done it in the gym?<br \/>\nHave you done it on a whim?<br \/>\nHave you done it on a dare?<br \/>\nDo you really think we care?<\/P><\/p>\n<p>Answer these, and count your &#8220;no&#8221;s,<br \/>\npray this number never grows.<br \/>\nFifty questions we asked thee,<br \/>\nScore times two is your Purity.<\/P><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Have you done it on a boat? Have you done it with a goat? Have you done it in a bed? Have you done it with the dead? Have you done it in the ass? Have you done it, high on grass? Have you done it in the car? Have you simply gone too far? [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[36],"tags":[537,1217,1224],"class_list":["post-1209","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-men-vs-womendating","tag-dr-seuss","tag-purity","tag-quiz"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1209","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1209"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1209\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1209"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1209"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1209"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}