{"id":1141,"date":"2014-12-26T23:36:52","date_gmt":"2014-12-26T21:36:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1141"},"modified":"2014-12-26T23:36:52","modified_gmt":"2014-12-26T21:36:52","slug":"things-not-to-say-on-a-date","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1141","title":{"rendered":"Bad Things to Say on a Date"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><P>There are LOTS of ways to ruin a date.  Here are a few things NOT to say on a<br \/>\ndate.<\/P><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Nice outfit. Is that a wonder-bra?<\/li>\n<li>I really don&#8217;t like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired.<\/li>\n<li>No wine for me tonight. My urologist says it&#8217;s not good to mix alcohol and penicillin.<\/li>\n<li>I used to come here all the time with my ex.<\/li>\n<li>I never said you NEED a nose job. I just said it wouldn&#8217;t hurt to consider it.<\/li>\n<li>Could you excuse me? My cat gets lonely if he doesn&#8217;t hear my voice on the answering machine every hour.<\/li>\n<p><li>I really feel that I&#8217;ve grown in the past few years. Used to be, I wouldn&#8217;t<br \/>\nhave given someone like you a second look.<\/li>\n<\/p>\n<li>I know you said you don&#8217;t eat anything with a face. But a good butcher will cut that part off for you if you ask.<\/li>\n<li>It&#8217;s been tough, but I&#8217;ve come to accept that most people I date just won&#8217;t be as smart as I am.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>There are LOTS of ways to ruin a date. Here are a few things NOT to say on a date. Nice outfit. Is that a wonder-bra? I really don&#8217;t like this restaurant that much, but I wanted to use this 2-for-1 coupon before it expired. No wine for me tonight. My urologist says it&#8217;s not [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpmdr_menu":1,"wpmdr_menu_extended":{"individualPostRemove":1,"individualPostRemoveDate":1,"individualPostRemoveAuthor":1,"individualPostYoastRemovePublished":1,"individualPostYoastRemoveModified":1},"footnotes":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[479],"class_list":["post-1141","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-for-men","tag-dating"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1141","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1141"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1141\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1141"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1141"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1141"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}