{"id":1020,"date":"2014-12-26T17:42:51","date_gmt":"2014-12-26T15:42:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/joke-archives.com\/fun\/?p=1020"},"modified":"2014-12-26T17:42:51","modified_gmt":"2014-12-26T15:42:51","slug":"border-patrol","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/?p=1020","title":{"rendered":"Border Patrol"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says, &#8220;Sorry, you know the law, you&#8217;ve got to go back across the border right now.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The Mexican man pleads with them, &#8220;No, noooo Se&#241;or, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The Border Patrol Agent thinks to himself&#8211;I&#8217;m going to make it hard for him&#8211;and says, &#8220;Ok, I&#8217;ll let you stay if you can use three English words in a sentence.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The Mexican man of course agrees.<\/p>\n<p>The Border Patrol Agent tells him, &#8220;The three words are: Green, Pink and Yellow. Now use them in one sentence.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>The Mexican man thinks really hard for about two minutes, then says, &#8220;Hmmm, Ok. The phone, it went Green, Green, Green&#8211;I Pink it up, and sez Yellow?&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A US Border Patrol Agent catches an illegal alien in the bushes right by the border fence, he pulls him out and says, &#8220;Sorry, you know the law, you&#8217;ve got to go back across the border right now.&#8221; The Mexican man pleads with them, &#8220;No, noooo Se&#241;or, I must stay in de USA! Pleeeze!&#8221; The [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[262],"class_list":["post-1020","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-copsrobbers","tag-border-patrol"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1020","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1020"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1020\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1020"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1020"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.joke-archives.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1020"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}