Number of physicians in the US: 700,000
Accidental deaths caused by physicians per year: 120,000
Accidental deaths per physicians…..0.171
Source: US Dept. of Health and Human Services

Number of gun owners in the US: 80,000,000
Number of accidental gun deaths per year ( all age groups): 1,500
Accidental deaths per gun owner: 0.0000188

Statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.

FACT : Not everyone has a gun, but everyone has at least one Doctor.

Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We must ban doctors before this gets out of hand.

Remember: Guns don’t kill people, doctors do!

• He calls you at two in the morning “just to talk.”
• Instead of rubber surgical gloves he wears oven mitts.
• He keeps accidentally referring to himself as “the defendant.”
• After examining you, he says, “Now do me.”
• He thinks Eastern Medicine was developed in Long Island.
• He keeps accidentally referring to your legs as “drumsticks.”
• His examination room is Room 201 at the No-Tell Motel.
• He introduces you to his anesthesiologist, “Doctor Jim Beam.”
• Before surgery, he asks if you want this “to go.”
• He tries to color your X-rays with crayons.

A woman and a baby come into the doctor’s office. She is taken into an examining room and waits for the doctor.

After arriving there, the doctor examines the baby, and finds him not gaining much weight and asks the woman, “Is he breast fed or on the bottle?”

“Oh…he is breast fed!”, replied the woman.

“Well then, strip down to your waist,” orders the doctor.

She takes off her top and bra and sits on the exam table. The doc starts pressing, kneading and pinching both breasts for quite a while in a very detailed and thorough examination.

The doc motions to her to get dressed, then the doctor says, “No wonder this baby is so hungry. You don’t have any milk!”

The woman with a wry grin on her face responds…”Well of course I don’t. I’m his aunt – but I’m SURE GLAD I brought him in!”