Toy Disclaimers
- No beanies or babies harmed in the manufacture of this product.
- Warning: This fad will disappear in 6 weeks.
- Caution: Care Bears do not actually care very much.
- Warning: This toy produces substantially less childish glee in real life than it does in the TV commercial.
- Some dismemberment may occur.
- Do not purchase this toy at all. Put it back on the shelf! NOW!! Just walk away, timid little man.
- Failure to fall immediately to your knees in gratitude and eternally thank parents for shelling out $400 and waiting in line behind a smelly woman from Jersey City for two hours to *get* your Sega Dreamcast -- especially when you've already got a Playstation and a box full of games that are now headed for the next garage sale -- may result in bodily injury.
- Do not stare at product. Hey! You're doing it now! Cut that out!!
- In case of breakage, scream until dad buys a replacement.
- Not to be taken internally, literally or seriously.
- Use as an actual terrorist device not recommended.
- Do not attempt to combine your Ultra Mega Warrior with your cat to make
Ultra Mega Cat Warrior.
- NOTE: The makers of "Queen Amidala's Naboo Dream Palace" assume no responsibility for the quality of the movie which spawned it.
- Some assimilation required. Resistance is futile.