• "Thank you for calling Dell. All operators are currently helping other customers. You have been on hold for approximately... one... thousand... years...."
• "Senator Thurmond, your wife is on line 3."
• "Another Christmas like this, and Amazon.com just may turn a profit!"
• "Chris White, you have been defrosted to stand judgment for the recently discovered document known as 'The Rejected Hurricane Name List'."
• "I found it on the Galactinet -- I think it's a picture of how humans used to reproduce."
• "Hi, I'm Dick Clark, here to count you down into the new millennium!"
• "I did *not* have cybersex with that netbot."
• "Okay, I'll go over it one more time: It doesn't really start until January 1, *3001* because..."
• "Middle East peace talks have been put on hold once again..."
• "25,000 zelgers, same as on Mars."
• "We at NASA cannot be discouraged by this recent failure, and we are fully confident that our next manned mission to Mars will be a complete success."
• "I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of Wal-Mart..."