Dear Friend:

This letter is being sent to you because I know you are interested in having a beautiful lawn this summer.

This is a fertilizer club and it will not cost you one cent. Upon receipt of this letter, go to the address at the top of the list and shit on the lawn. You will not be the only one there, so don't be embarrassed.

Make five copies of this letter and send them to five of your friends who appreciate good lawns.

You will not get any money or checks, but within one week, if this chain is not broken, there will be 9,216 people shitting on your lawn. Your reward will come next summer when you have the greenest lawn in the neighborhood.

Mrs. Ima Enama	Mrs. Max Stink	Mr. Harry Butt
15 W. Sore Hinne Rd.	1605 Grunt'n'Groan Ave.	236 Corn Cob Alley
Seapwater Gap, PA	Forcet, DE	Flushing, NY
Mrs. Lucy Bowells	Mrs. Tom Tightsqueeze	Mrs. Opal Crapp
452 Diahrrea Dr.	697 Grunt Ave.	2255 Enema Dr.
Runnytown, PA	Movement, IL	Clearview, FL
Mr. Howie Fartz	Mrs. Smelly Buttz	Mr. Charles Syringe
Constipation Blvd.	935 Bed Pan Alley	2 Suppository Lane
Squeezethru, NY	Emptyit, MD	Smellytown, OR
Mrs. I. Doitdaily	Mr. G. Howett Smells	Mrs. Kelly B. Hind
365 Hopperseat Rd.	117 Foreign Matters Bl.	428 Gashouse Rd.
Manurepile, MA	Stinkerville, MS	Oily Flats, PA
Mrs. A Biggermovement	Mrs. B. Poopado
53 Rectum Pl.	Out House Lane
Rearview, FL	Scoupditch, PA

P.S. If you are constipated, pass this on to your neighbor... Do not break the chain. One man didn't give a shit and he lost his entire lawn.