• After years of indiscretion,
  at last I've come to learn,
  that I must send this Valentine,
  To Whom it May Concern.
• Valentine, I think you're great,
  a Chief Executive who can delegate.
  And you warm this First Lady's heart,
  by having interns do the unpleasant part.
• On most every day,
  I like McDonald's fries.
  On Valentine's Day,
  I prefer Monica's thighs -- Super Sized!
• Will you deny, Valentine?
Hey, Big Creep, on Valentine's Day,
we'll play Marilyn and JFK.
Just make sure that Hillary's gone,
'cause you get me interned on!
• How do I love thee?
  Let me count the entries in the visitors' log.
• Monica, Monica, quiet young mouse
  -- taking her Bill to the floor of the House.
• Hi there! Happy Valentine's day!
  Sorry to serve your subpoena this way.
• Roses are red,
  then they turn gray,
  My heart goes pitter-pat
  when you wear that beret.
• Shall I compare thee to my high school drama teacher?
• Twinkle, twinkle, Kenneth Starr,
  I talked to Vernon in the car.
  I promised him my lips are sealed,
  but I'll change my mind, for a sweet book deal.
• As soon as I'm finished bombing Iraq,
  I'd like to get you in the sack.
• Will you,
  on the night in question
  of February 14th,
  be my Valentine?
• Violets are blue,
  roses are thorny.
  All hell breaks loose,
  when Bubba gets horny.
• I'll bomb England, I'll bomb France,
  If you'll remove my underpants.