No one can fracture a Christmas carol better than a kid. Sing along with these new takes on old favorites:

• Deck the Halls with Buddy Holly

• We three kings of porridge and tar

• On the first day of Christmas my tulip gave to me

• Later on we'll perspire, as we dream by the fire.

• He's makin' a list, chicken and rice.

• Noel. Noel, Barney's the king of Israel.

• With the jelly toast proclaim

• Olive, the other reindeer.

• Frosty the Snowman is a ferret elf, I say

• Sleep in heavenly peas

• In the meadow we can build a snowman, Then pretend that he is sparse and brown

• You'll go down in listerine

• Oh, what fun it is to ride with one horse, soap and hay

• Come, froggy faithful

• You'll tell Carol, "Be a skunk, I require"

• Good tidings we bring to you and your kid