• CONTROVERSY: Should the tree be real or fake?
• YUPPIE: Live tree, planted after use.
  MALE: Fake tree, discarded after use.
  FEMALE: Grow tree in house, adorned with fruits
  REALITY: Fake tree stays up until May, adorned with fur balls.
• CONTROVERSY: Should tree lights twinkle or stay constant?
• YUPPIE: Each bulb blinks to its own random rhythm.
  MALE: Bulbs flash logo of football team.
  FEMALE: Elegant flickering candles.
  REALITY: Tree bursts into flames, burns house down.
• CONTROVERSY: Should tree be topped with an angel or a star?
• YUPPIE: Gender-neutral angel; no submissive female stereotype.
  MALE: Blonde angel, kneeling, in a wet T-shirt.
  FEMALE: Authentic angel explains true meaning of Christmas.
  REALITY: Hell's Angel steals the tree and the gifts.
• CONTROVERSY: Do you fling or hang tinsel?
• YUPPIE: Empower each strand with/self-determining skills.
  MALE: Six large clumps of tinsel on front of tree.
  FEMALE: Each icicle hangs like strand of spaghetti.
  REALITY: More icicles on floor than on tree.
• CONTROVERSY: Do you open gifts on Christmas Eve or Morning.
• YUPPIE: Gifts opened on posted, individual schedules.
  MALE: Anytime, just so it doesn't interfere with football.
  FEMALE: Anytime the entire family is present.
  REALITY: Doesn't matter, everyone's peeked anyway.