Okay, you've heard of Murphy's famous Law: Everything that can go wrong will go wrong. There are many other related Laws, as well. Here are some:
- After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
Lorenz's Law of Mechanical Repair- Identical parts aren't.
Beach's Law- Any tool, when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner.
Anthony's Law of the Workshop- Nothing is as inevitable as a mistake whose time has come.
Tussman's Law- If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
Lowery's Law- The solution to a problem changes the problem.
Peer's Law- There is no mechanical problem so difficult that it cannot be solved by brute strength and ignorance.
William's Law- Handy Guide to Modern Science:
If it's green or it wiggles, it's Biology.
If it stinks, it's Chemistry.
If it doesn't work, it's Physics.- Machines should work. People should think.
IBM's Pollyanna Principle- The most ineffective workers will be systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage - management.
The Dilbert Principle- The first rule of intelligent tinkering is to save all the parts.
Ehrlich's Law- It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry.
Ralph's Observation- If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.
Cannon's Comment- Thinly sliced cabbage.
Cole's Law- Never accept a drink from a urologist, nor a friendly handshake from a proctologist.
The Law of Common Sense- Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
The Law of Reality- When putting cheese in a mousetrap, always leave room for the mouse.
The Law of Avoiding Oversell- Sometimes you are the dog. Sometimes you are the hydrant.
Law of Physical Displacement- Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege.
Legal Rights- Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
Law of Probable Dispersal- Be a good housekeeper. When you leave him ... get a good lawyer ...keep his house.
Law Pertaining to Divorce