• Geriatric City
  • Quality housing for older citizens that couldn't attract retirees, despite the mirrored bedroom ceilings, the hot tubs, the adjacent burial plots and other amenities.

• Pump and Hump
  • A Nevada brothel that offered self-service gasoline to its customers.

• Sticky Wickets
  • Pre-owned erotica for sale at attractive discount prices.

• Hair and Now
  • Fast, inexpensive hair replacement using cat fur and thumb tacks.

• Paradise Lost and Found
  • A gynecological clinic franchise specializing in "50,000 mile tune-ups".

• UNIX for Hire
  • A computer consulting firm that just couldn't build a long-term customer base.

• In the Closet
  • A line of closet organizers that never caught on with young marrieds and new homeowners.

• Scratch and Sniff
  • A new medication for hemorroids...available in all your favorite fragrances.