• Discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal is perfectly normal to you.

• You find humor in other people's stupidity.

• You believe in serial spraying of Prozac.

• Your idea of comforting a child is placing him in a papoose restraint.

• You believe that "Shallow Gene Pool" should be a diagnosis.

• You believe that the government should require a permit to reproduce.

• You think unspeakable evil will befall you is anyone says: "Boy, it sure is quiet around here."

• When you are out in public, you compliment complete strangers on their veins.

• You have ever wanted to hold a seminar entitled: "Suicide - Getting It Right The First Time."

• You have ever had to leave a patient's room before laughing hysterically.

• You think caffeine should be available in IV form.

• You have ever restrained someone, and it was not a sexual experience.

• You commonly utter the phrase: "What changed tonight at 2am that made this emergency after 6 months?!"

• You believe that "Too Stupid To Live" should be a diagnosis.

• You think putting a Valium salt lick in the ER waiting room is a novel idea.

• When you mention vegetables, you are not thinking of a food group.

• You have been exposed to so many x-rays you don't even bother with birth control.

• You have used the words "Healthcare Reform" to strike fear in the hearts of your co-workers.

• You have heard, "Why, I don't know how that got stuck there" too many times.