• State-of-the-Art
  • Any computer you can't afford.

• Obsolete
• Any computer you own.
• Microsecond
• The time it takes for your state-of-the-art computer to become obsolete.
• Syntax Error
• Walking into a computer store and saying... 'Hi, I want to buy a computer and money is no object.'
• Hard Drive
• The sales technique employed by computer salesmen, especially after a Syntax Error.
• GUI
• What your computer becomes after spilling your coffee on it. (pronounced 'gooey')
• Keyboard
• The standard way to generate computer errors.
• Mouse
• An advanced input device to make computer errors easier to generate.
• Floppy
• The state of your wallet after purchasing a computer.
• Portable Computer
• A device invented to force businessmen to work at home, on vacation, and on business trips.
• Disk Crash
• A typical computer response to any critical deadline.
• Power User
• Anyone who can format a disk from DOS.
• System Update
• A quick method of trashing ALL of your software.
• 386
• The average IQ needed to understand a PC.