- Why do men become smarter during sex?
(because they are plugged into a genius)- Why don't women blink during foreplay?
(they don't have enough time)- Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
(they don't stop for directions)- Why did God put men on earth?
(because a vibrator can't mow the lawn)- Why don't women have men's brains?
(because they don't have penises to put them in)- What do electri trains and breasts have in common?
(they're intended for children but men usually end up playing with them)- Why do men snore when they lie on their backs?
(because their balls fall over their assholes and they vapor lock)- Why do men masturbate?
(it is sex with someone they love)- Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
(so they won't hump women's legs at cocktail parties)- Why did God make men before women?
(you need a rough draft before you make a final copy)- Why is a man's pee yellow and his sperm white?
(so he can tell if he's coming or going)- How many men does it take to put a toilet seat down?
(nobody knows, since it has never happened)- Arguments: A woman has the last word in any argument.
(Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument)