• She puts your dinner on the floor in the Rover Dish.
• The milkman is wearing your bathrobe.
• You get a ticket for the Jerry Springer Show.
• She starts every sentence with the words ..."To whom it may concern."
• Your mail comes addressed to "Current Resident."
• The local mortician starts measuring you for a new suit.
• Her mother looks at you and starts laughing.
• You are urged to stir your coffee "very well," before drinking it.
• Your favorite easy chair is plugged into the wall outlet.
• All of your shirts have a target painted on them.
• People are referring to her as the "widow."
• You come home and all that is left of the house is the foundation.
• Your name is Fred and a new tattoo just below her navel reads ... "Joe's Place."