The following exchanges are taken from transcripts of 911 calls.

• Caller: "I'd like to make a unanimous complaint, so don't use my name."

• Caller: "I'm reporting a deer on the road. I almost hit it."
  Call-taker: "Is the deer alive?"
  Caller: "Oh, no, it's run over. Many, many cars. Again and again, and - OH NO!!! NOT AGAIN!"

• Caller: "Am I talking to a real person, or this a recording?"

• Caller: "We might (cough) need the fire department here (cough)."

• Caller: "Is it okay for a civilian to take a person to the hospital, or does the ambulance have to do it?"

• Caller: (irate) "That's 'W' as in Williams and 'Y' as in why."

• Caller (on realising the police are on the way): "Get the keg outta here, dude!"

• Caller: "He's not breathing!"
  Call-taker: "Can you get the phone close to him?"
  Caller: "WHY? You want to hear he's not breathing, too?"

• Call-taker: "Does she have any weapons?"
  Caller: "Well, she has real long finger nails."

• Call-taker: "We'll need a description of him."
  Caller: "He's a lawyer."

• Caller: "No, she just didn't fall...I helped her!"

• Complaint about a stolen mailbox:
  Call-taker: "What is your address?"
  Caller: "It's gone."

• Caller: "I'm scared, I just got a Ouija board for my birthday, and now there's writing on my wall and I can't get it off......this thing is going back to K-Mart first thing in the morning!