• A vibrators only function is to please you.
• They don't watch televised sports when you want to talk.
• They don't talk when you want to watch a movie on TV.
• You'll never have to put your vibrator in your mouth.
• Vibrators never pick their nose in bed.
• Vibrators move.
• Vibrators find all the right spots.
• Vibrators don't do household chores--- but you don't care.
• A vibrator never leaves you or flirts with your friends.
• Vibrators never make a mess.
• You never worry about where your vibrator has been before.
• A vibrator will never call out someone else's name when it is with you.
• A vibrator will never ask you to bring it a beer.
• Even if your vibrator is working overtime, you know exactly where it is.
• A vibrator is easy to turn on and off.
• You can spend hours in a bar with your vibrator, and it will still be able to perform when you get it home.
• A vibrator doesn't care how long it takes to satisfy you.
• Your mother will never ask what your vibrator does for a living.
• A vibrator won't get pissed of when dinner isn't cooked.
• Vibrators can't get you pregnant, give you a disease, or make you watch auto racing.
• Vibrators take up very little room on the bed.
• Vibrators never bother you when you want to sleep.
• Vibrators never compare size with other vibrators.
• You'll never have to share your vibrator with another woman.
• Your vibrator doesn't mind if you forget to shave.
• Vibrators never fart in bed.
• A vibrator won't turn off before you finish.
• It is ok to have more than one vibrator in bed with you at a time.
• If you have a headache or your period, you won't find a vibrator turned on when you get into bed.
• Vibrators are ALWAYS hard.