• Sensory deprivation is when your Dom hides your hearing aid batteries.
• Your nipple clamps have training wheels.
• Edge play is standing by the microwave with a pacemaker.
• When you tell your sub to get the cane, you have to specify "walking" or "beating".
• You can't tell the difference between your tattoos and your age spots.
• You shout "One, two, three, CLEAR!" for electrical play.
• Your idea of breath play is when your wheelchair runs over your oxygen hose.
• Your idea of suspension is an UltraLift^TM bra.
• You hold the paddle and say, "You're younger than me.... back into the paddle....HARD!"
• Age play really is 24/7.