- Name:_______________________________________________
- Nickname:________________
C.B. Handle_________________ - Mobile Home Color:
____ Two-tone, Brown and White
____ Two-tone, Pink and White
____ Faded Green - Daddy: (if unknown, attach list of three suspects):
_______________ ______________ _____________
- Mama: _____________
- Neck Shade
____ Light Red
____ Medium Red
____ Dark Red - Number of teeth in exposed full grin
____ Upper
____ Lower - Model of pickup truck:__________
Size of tires: _____________ - ____ Number of beer cans on floor of pickup truck
- Truck equipped with:
____ Gun Rack
____ Mud Flaps
____ Camper Top
____ Air Horn
____ American Flag
____ 4-W Drive
____ 8-Track
____ Rust
____ Fuzz Buster
____ Roll Bar
____ C.B.
____ Dents
____ Load of wood
____ Mud Tires
____ Deer poaching spot light
____ Playboy emblem hanging from rearview mirror
____ Woman’s garter hanging from rearview mirror
____ Pine tree air freshener hanging from rearview mirror - Bumper Stickers
____ Honk if You’re Horny
____ *uck ’em Bucky
____ Almost Heaven, Hayward
____ Where the Hell is Rhinelander?
____ Feminazis for Kohl
____ Wisconsin State Bird: Mosquito
____ Ducks Unlimited
____ Walleyes Unlimited
____ Tommy Bartlett Water Show
____ Nuke Illinois
____ Eat Cheese or Die
____ Cheddarheads for Bush
____ You’ll Get My Gun When You Pry My Cold Dead Fingers From Around The Barrel
____ The Pack is Back (on bumper since 1973) - Favorite Meal:
____ Anything fried in lard
____ Pickled pigs feet
____ Bratwurst and Old Milwaukee
____ Venison sausage and Old Milwaukee
____ Cheesecurds and Old Milwaukee
____ Green bean and mushroom soup casserole
____ Slim Jims and lime Jell-o - Favorite Music:
____ Country
____ Western
____ Country Western
____ Anything played by an accordian - Favorite Recreation:
____ Deer Huntin
____ Snowmobilin
____ Fishin with live bait
____ Watching Green Acres reruns
____ Deer huntin while drinking
____ Snowmobilin while drinking
____ Fishin with live bait while drinking
____ Watchin Green Acres while drinking - Favorite Weapon:
____ .22
____ 30/30
____ 30/06
____ Ice auger
____ Chain saw
____ Tire iron
____ Forehead
____ Wife - Favorite Fragrance:
____ Wet dogs
____ WD-40
____ Old Milwaukee
____ Minnow bucket
____ Frying Spam
____ Diesel fuel
____ A paper mill on a hot day in August
____ Fish guts after a week in the trash (in the garage) in August
____ Any scent eminating from a bodily orifice - Favorite Cap Emblem:
____ Old Milwaukee
____ Stihl
____ Blatz
____ Skoal
____ Packers
____ Pabst
____ John Deere
____ Hamms
____ Brewers
____ Point Beer
____ Old Fart
____ Old Style - Favorite Reading:
____ Fishing Facts
____ TV Guide
____ Beer Bottle Labels
____ Enquirer
____ Guns & Ammo
____ Today’s Mercenary
____ Polka Digest
____ Aryan Review
____ Welfare Application
____ Sports Illustrated (swimsuit edition only) - ____ Length of Right Leg:
____ Length of Left Leg - Things in Your Front Yard:
____ Various kitchen appliances
____ Piles of split wood
____ Cars on blocks
____ Dismantled snowmobiles
____ Dog run with all the grass worn away down to rock hard dirt
____ Broken, metal frame, screen gazebo
____ Deer hanging from tree limb–in season
____ Deer Hanging from tree limb–out of season
____ Wood cut-out of bent over woman - When was your last sighting of Elvis?:
_________________ - Do you wear mostly polyester pant with snags?:
____ yes
____ no - Do you own any shoes? (not counting boots):
____ yes
____ no - Are you married to any of the following:
____ Sister
____ Cousin
____ Cousin’s sister - Can you beat your wife at arm wrestling?
____ yes
____ no - Typical Greeting:
____ Good Morning, dere
____ Dem Packers is playing like a buncha old women
____ Dem Brewers is playing like a buncha old women
____ Dem Badgers is playing like a buncha old women
____ Dem Bucks is playing like a buncha old women
____ Dey should take da whole buncha dem Madison liberals and queers and line em up and shoot em.
____ Dey should just let dem Indians spear dose idiots at the DNR
____ Ya, hey - Favorite Tavern Name:
____ County Trunk Bar
____ Dew Drop Inn
____ Deer Drop Inn
____ Deer Droppings Inn
____ LakeSide Supper Club
____ LakeView Supper Club
____ LakeWood Supper Club
____ PineSide Supper Club
____ PineView Supper Club
____ PineWood Supper Club - Favorite Automobile:
____ ’67 Ford Galaxy
____ ’67 Ford Galaxy with transmission
____ ’67 Ford Galaxy with ’73 Chevy Impala transmission
____ ’67 Ford Galaxy with ’73 Chevy Impala transmission and ’71 Buick LeSabre engine - Farthest Point South Ever Traveled:
____ County Trunk GG
____ County Trunk CC
____ County Trunk Bar
____ Winter
____ Polar
____ Klondike
____ Maple
____ Poplar
____ Birchwood
____ Manitowish
____ Namekagon
____ Ojibwa
____ Peru
____ Scandinavia
____ Athens
____ Irma
____ Helma
____ Loretta
____ Beaver
____ An ice shanty on the Flambeau Flowage - Most Memorable Event You’ve Ever Attended
____ Minocqua Moose Call Competition
____ Phelps Mister Potato Carnival
____ Gleason Grouse Mating Gala
____ Herbster Jaycees Seagull Doo-Doo Days
____ Lake Tomahawk Crew Cut Championships
____ Omega Outboard Motor Repair Finals
____ Spread Eagle International Proctologists Convention
____ Chetek Carp Queen Beauty Contest and Carp Cuisine Cook-Off
____ Eagle River Shout-Off for the Deaf (held week after the snowmobile races)
Your Signature (an X will do): ________________________________